The 'Philosophy' of Rope
So, what is rope ‘really’ about? Lets discuss some of the underlying concepts of connection & partnership, as well as some fundamental ideas about how you actually handle your rope.
There’s a little bit of reading involved at the start here, I know its not exactly fun, but please bear with me for the first three units; reading these now will enhance your experience over all, and will mean you don’t have to come back to these reading assignments later.
So, is rope all about how much of a technical pattern you can make? I would say not.
If you look at the pattern in this sculptural tie, you can see it is very complex, there is a lot going on.
Looking at the photo of my partner in this wrist tie & chest harness however (visually a very simple tie) you might be surprised to learn that this was harder in some ways to set up than the sculpture shown above.
The sculpture has so much intricacy in where each line is going, and how each line is suspending the rocks in the net, but that’s just tying lengths of rope.
With my partner in the wrist tie and chest harness (or the ‘Futomomo’ pictured here), there was so much interaction between her and I that could be talked about. It would take 30 minutes to fully explain all the things she and I did to create the connection between us during the tie (yes, even one as simple as that).
It took me 2 years to get to a level of experience where I felt that I could tie this with the level of connection that I really wanted, and in a way that I felt my partner really enjoy.
First, “What is rope?”
Rope, tying someone in the form of Shibari, is almost never about the specific tie you are doing; its about the connection between two partners.
Additionally, there are many different ‘styles’ of rope. So generally speaking; rope is just putting some kind of rope on someone, in some way, to create some experience; how you do that varies with the type of rope you’re doing: sensual, sadistic, aesthetic, photoshoot, predicament, general connection, etc.
All are valid, and no specific style of rope is ‘more correct’ or ‘above’ the other. You will also need to spend some time thinking about (and trying) different styles of rope, as well is practicing many different ties. This will give you an idea of what you personally like the best. Knowing what style you like is very important.
I’ll say this again – most of rope isn’t about the technical or mechanical; it’s about the connection between two partners.
Connection is rarely something that you’ll see depicted well in a book, and its often forgotten in the cognitive overload that is learning single column ties, harnesses, and ‘the cool stuff’. You can do a great deal, have amazing fun with a partner, and (most importantly) give your partner a really good time with not very much rope.
How rope is handled in Shibari?
In Japanese rope bondage, Shibari, Kinbaku, etc, the rope is typically 8m long and handled by starting from the middle. Find the two ends of your rope, fold it in half and grab the centre of the rope. This folded loop of rope is called the a “bight” (pronounced the same as “bite”, or “byte”). Virtually all ties start here with Shibari
The idea of “columns”:
In Shibari we are most often tying to the columns of the body. What is a ‘column’?
- The wrist is a column
- The arm is a column
- The ankle, leg, or thigh are all columns
- The hips are a column
- The torso is a column
- (with very specific safety practices in place, and used with great care…) the neck is also a column.
- DO NOT tie to the neck unless you have been shown how to, and know very precisely how to do so safely:
- How will your partner safeword?
- Can they safeword if their airway is compromised?
- Can the tie crush their airway?
- Can the tie collapse?
- Do you know the tie better than the Burlington bowline?
- WHERE ARE YOUR SAFETY CUTTERS?
Generally speaking when we start a tie, we are tying rope round one or more of these columns, this is where the first tie we ever learn gets its name; “the single column tie”.
The Non-collapsing Single Column Tie
What are “Non collapsing column ties” you ask?
Good question – a non-collapsing-tie is any tie that doesn’t tighten around a column when you pull on the working end. See the Burlington bowline, somerville bowline, flogging cuff, boola boola, chain stitch single column tie, etc. There are many single column ties, each can serve a unique purpose and has its own pros and cons. The first S.C.T that I teach is the burlington bowline. We will cover this in a hot minute, but for now, we need to discuss some general safety points for rope and kink.
I know! I know…reading more before actually learning to tie isn’t fun, but please stick with me; reading this now will enhance your experience over all, and will just mean you don’t have to come back to it later.